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What follows is in response to the 100 Word Challenge, authored by the sturdy Velvet Verbosity. The word this week is "Broken".
At first glance, he looks rather normal.
He's tall and lean, dressed in clean but well worn jeans and a light blue shirt, open at the collar. He leans on the bar and his fingers encircle his glass, but he does not drink. He just stares into the glass, instead.
His face is pleasant, handsome, even. His blondish hair is long and he has a cowlick that women find endearing.
Everything about him just looks normal. Until you look into his eyes. When you look into his eyes, you can see his pain - you can see that he is broken.
Ndinombethe.
11 comments:
This would be a great opening to a short story. I want more;)
Oh, I want to hear his story. My heart already goes out to him.
so much angst - and I wanna know more - in just 100 words. Nicely done.
In these few words you've created an endearing, yet tragic character. Nicely done.
Okay, Lou, I'll try to continue mine next time if you do the same!!
The eyes don't lie....
I could just picture this, very well done!
Beatiful words. I also found this challenge today.
I'm glad to see that you plan to continue this. It was a very intriguing beginning. (And present tense, too. Jeff would be pleased.)
I too am already intrigued with this bittersweet fellow. I do hope you decide to build on this. Really nice character description!
I've met my share of people like that. All looks well on the outside, but something's not right on the inside.
Sad.
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