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4/21/2011

100 Word Challenge - Distance (and Rita)


What follows is in response to the 100 Word Challenge, authored by the inescapable Velvet Verbosity. The word this week is "Distance".

100 Word Challenge


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The old woman sat in her rocking chair, on the rickety porch that was in terrible need of whitewash. She sat with a pan of beans in her lap. Beans to be cut for supper it would seem, but she had stopped what she was doing. Her head was raised as if looking afar, her back straight, the look on her face, expectant. Her unseeing eyes let tears down her withered black cheeks, but a smile graced her lips nonetheless.

The young woman stood on the broken stair. "I'm home, Mama."

"I know child. I saw you, at a distance."




RITA


She sat next to me, at the Meetup.
Until that day, apparently, she'd never known
that women get piercings "down there".

Ndinombethe.

20 comments:

Shadow said...

that is a beautiful story. very 'feeling'...

Tara R. said...

This was heart-achingly (it's a word!) beautiful. I could 'see' the scene play out perfectly.

Megryansmom said...

In my defense, I knew about the 'down there' it was the 'back there' that blew me away LOL

barbara said...

This is a beautiful look at a mother's unfailing lo:)ve. Well said and thank you.

and side note to Megryansmom . . . I'm so glad I wasn't drinking anything when I read your comment.
:) lol!!!

Employee No. 3699 said...

Loved the Hundred Words.

That being said, I can see you with a bunch of women discussing piercings 'down there' and picture the look on your face...probably blank. But your thoughts? Hmm...

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

Beautiful words, hon!

AuroraLee said...

Great imagery in this piece. Keep it up! :)

Lance said...

I like the visual that lays out in front of me. Excellently written.

Melisa with one S said...

Thanks for making me laugh so hard that I now can't breathe! :)

Grandmother said...

Sweet, very sweet.
The WV is "tivingle", which is what you do when you get those kind of piercings.

Amy M. said...

that pic of rita is so lovely. also, i do not remember any talk about piercings "back there". where the heck was i?!

Teresa said...

Wonderful story. Lots of emotion for so few words.

PattiKen said...

This is beautiful, Lou. I can see the scene perfectly.

Ms. Marsha said...

Very beautiful, wonderful visual. I can absolutely see this entire scene.

Michael said...

My heavens. What a story.

Mrs4444 said...

Okay, since you brought the subject up, I'll tell you that I once had an adult girl friend who had never looked "down there" and was shocked to learn that babies and urine didn't come out of the same place. (That should make Rita feel a little better.)

Debra Ann Elliott said...

What a beautiful story. Reminded me of myself and my grandmother.

Karin said...

This brought tears to my eyes. It was absolutely beautiful!

FGHart said...

I raised 3 prodigal daughters. Each of their homecomings have been precious to me. Your 100 words evoked powerful memories.

Velvet Verbosity said...

Touching. :)