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10/25/2008

post wedding facto

Annie and I went to a friend's wedding last evening. 5:30 on a Friday. I've never been to a wedding on a Friday before.

It was a lovely and intimate ceremony in a small Episcopalian Church. The pastor was the same woman who baptized the bride 10 years ago. (She wasn't baptized as a baby.) It was an emotional experience for everyone there.

I have know the bride since she was born. Her family has been close to Annie's family for many years. We have been friends for many years. Almost 20 years ago, her Dad contracted meningitis for a second time. It affected his brain. It left him with the mind of a 6 year old. He lives, today, in a nursing home in Wisconsin.

Her Mom died of a virulent cancer, the likes of which I've never seen before, less than a year ago. She was diagnosed and died within a matter of weeks. She had always been healthy. She just suddenly sickened and died.

Her name was Candy. She was as sweet a person as you will ever find. She was one of the most absent-minded and forgetful people I have ever known, yet it was that pleasant absent-mindedness which endeared her to so many people. You've heard of the absent-minded professor? Well, she was the absent-minded sweetheart.

It was an emotional experience to see her daughter married, yesterday. I remember that young lady kicking my hand as it lay on her Mom's belly, Candy having said, "Come feel this! This is what she does to my bladder!" She kicked hard. Poor Candy. I'm sure she had to change her drawers rather frequently.

This young lady has been the rock her Mom needed through all the hard times that followed after her Dad got sick. I hope these hard times are done for her, and that only good times are left for her to be had. She's had her share of the shit life can throw at you. More than her share. It's time for her to share in the good life.

Good Luck, Jess. And

Peace.

19 comments:

MissyBoo said...

Oh I so hope she has the "Happy Ever After"

Anonymous said...

Isn't it amazing to be there when they're born, and be part of their rites of passage?

Ndinombethe said...

Great that you got to share her special day./ Good luck Jess.

Unknown said...

Wow, that is amazing to have felt her kick from pre-birth and now to watch her get married. And maybe sometime soon she'll have a little kicker insider her belly, too!

Best of luck, Jess!

Shadow said...

i hope she has a beautiful new married life, full of happiness.
strange how weddings bring so many emotions to the fore... have a good saturday louceel

Anonymous said...

Sometimes it takes the contrast to really appreciate the magnificent things that are about to come!

Joyce-Anne said...

I hope that Jess does have her happier ever after. If anyone deserves it, she certainly does.

Julie said...

We need these -- the reminders that even when everything is terrible, it doesn't mean it will be terrible forever, that just because the last year was the worst, most horrible no good year ever it doesn't mean that the year ahead cannot be the best year ever.

Whoa. That sentence is a little convoluted, I hope you know what I mean.

Jientje said...

Some people get an awful lot on their plate, that's true!
It must have been a very very special
occasion, I can feel that.

Unknown said...

m+b: I hope so, too.

witchypoo: Makes me feel old, actually.

Tash: Yes, it was good. I have seen so many special days in her life.

Hyphen Mama: I'm sure little kickers are in the cards.

Shadow: It was a beautiful and emotion filled ceremony.

Ash: Yes, the thorns and the rose.

Joyce-Anne: That she does.

Julie: I know EXACTLY what you mean.

Jientje: Some people do seem to get more thrown at them than others, that's for sure.

Patsy said...

A beautiful bride --- I'm glad you and Annie were there for her. She sounds like a strong young lady -- happier days should be hers.

Momisodes said...

She certainly does deserve a slice of the good life. I can only imagine how incredible it was to see her transform from baby to bride.

May her and her husband share a lifetime of happiness.

Holly said...

"The pastor was the same woman who baptized the bride 10 years ago. (She wasn't baptized as a baby.)" Hee hee!

Many blessings to your friends....

Myst_72 said...

That would have meant so much to her, to have you there.
Getting married without my Dad was very hard, let alone without either of my parents.
I hope she has 'happy ever after'.

G
xx

Honeybell said...

Wow. May tragedy exist only in her past, congratulations to her!

Anonymous said...

Aw, Lou, that is so bittersweet. I connect, maybe, because my wedding day was without my mom who sounds an awful lot like Candy. It's good to be surrounded by the love of friends and family, especially when there is such a hole where someone important should be. Hugs to you for such beautiful words, and best wishes to the newlyweds.

Anonymous said...

In what can only be described as a truly Lou post, you expressed every emotion brides feel. Obviously, Jess has had a lot to battle, but I hope her marriage gives her the constancy she needs.

Wait. What? said...

What a post - how moving yet sad. I hope this is the good life now for Candy's daughter as well!

Cat

Anonymous said...

May they be blessed :)!