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9/29/2008

Stream of Consciousness

"Feather Moon" plays on a repeat loop in my iPod, loud enough to drown out the sound of the Bears game in the background. I love Vienna Teng. Her music has just enough melancholy to it to suit my search for my muse. For melancholy seems to suit her, whoever and wherever she is. She comes to me when it suits her, it seems, and it suits her most often when the music in my ears sets me down a peg or two. Slows me down and makes me, perhaps, a bit introspective.

I write until I run out of words and then I wait. I listen. I watch the game but the music keeps me grounded and I'm not really into the game, at all. I'm writing. And writing and painting are becoming more important to me that TV sports, or TV in general, for that matter. I am becoming less and less interested in the mindless pap that television offers for entertainment. No. That's not really fair. All I'm doing is echoing the sentiments of critics I've heard for years. TV is not really mindless pap. Writers work on these shows. Inventive people who would see us entertained by the product of their fertile and productive minds. And I'm sure that none of them want to have their stuff referred to as mindless pap. Sorry. The parrot lives in me sometimes. As it lives in us all. We see. We hear. And in the absence of the abiltiy or desire to form our own informed opinion we repeat the opinion of others. We give others authority over us by repeating their words - whether they REALLY represent us or not. So, no, not mindless pap, at all. But not as important to me anymore. I have things I'd rather do. I'm taking control. Of my time, of my life, of my opinions and things that matter to me.

Yesterday's post was so hard to write. Yesterday's post was so hard to live. A Sunday post. One not usually read by many. A response to a 100 Word Challenge. I had no idea. It just came out. I kept searching for an ending. I had to tie it to 'moral'. And I realized there is none. There never was one. And that's the point. But you all came to me and said kind and supportive things. Like you have always said to me. You can't know how much you all mean to me. You can't know what the things you say to me in comments mean to me.

Tomorrow is the end of The Kid. The last episode. What a ride. What fun this has been. I know what those guys who write for TV feel like, in a way. There was no Great Truth to find here. There was no secret sin to vent or explain away - no cleansing of inner demons. Just fun. Thank you, for letting me have fun.

Tomorrow is the last episode of The Kid, and Thursday is the "Epilogue". The last bit of fun. For now.

19 comments:

Jientje said...

Trying to find balance in it is sometimes hard. Reading blogs I like beats television for me too, yet one cannot call it mindless pap, it keeps other people happy, and it's made by people like us who like being creative! It's going to be empty without the Kid, did your muze give you another assignment yet?

River said...

I haven't yet read any of "The Kid". I have copy/pasted all the episodes to a word document, because I want to be able to read the whole thing from beginning to end, just like it was a book.

Patsy said...

Will you leave The Kid on the side bar for a while? I haven't taken the time to print it out yet. And tomorrow I'm working so I won't be by until evening ---
Good day to you.

moneythoughts said...

My daughter who works in TV production has several writer friends. One friend, Wendy, is a real piece of work, but in a nice way. She is in her mid 30's and like a lot of young people, is just trying to make a living. There are a lot worse things than TV, but I sometimes feel the same way about time being wasted in front of the tube. (And for some, it is not even a tube any more.) I write and paint in front of the TV, but when I write I mute the sound. My daughter's show is Kath & Kate starting October 9 on NBC, so tell all your readers to watch it. My daughter has to eat too.

Looking forward to the final episode of The Kid.

Ash said...

Much love, my dear. Much love.

Theresa said...

You just write so beautifully and from the heart. I've turned away from the TV too. I don't want the baby to fall into that trap... I don't want to fall into that trap with her. There are sooo many other things we can do.

Christy said...

People can be snotty, elitist and judgemental about......everything.

I remember when I first started learning about attachment in Buddhism and found out aversion is just as telling--or moreso--than attraction.

So now I watch what I "hate" and wonder why?

Joyce-Anne said...

For me, it seems like the tv is used more and more for backround noise. Oh sure, there are shows that I still watch. But, I've decided I prefer reading your blog. Do you think you'd mind posting more than once a day? lol ;-)

Holly at Tropic of Mom said...

You're right about parroting. It's easy to do, and it's harder to come up with our own way of saying things or our own way to think -- but it's so much more original.

Momisodes said...

Your writing seems so effortless. I really need to try the music thing more. If only I could turn it up loud enough to drown out the whining and "mommy!"

Oh, I forgot to mention in my earlier comment, Congratulations on the weight loss! That is wonderful progress. :)

Hyphen Mama said...

Waiting? Listening? Oh yes, someday that will return to my vocabulary. Until then, I'll live vicariously through you.

TOMORROW. TOMORROW. TOMORROW... the Kid.

Huckdoll said...

Oooh, sounds great. I'll have to peek back and catch up.

LceeL said...

Jientje: No, my muse is still out partying with yours.

River: I have found The Kid a difficult read whan I go back to re-read allat once. Maybe it's just me.

Patsy: The Kid will stay on my sidebar for the foreseeable future.

Moneythoughts: Kath & Kate. October 9th.

Ash: And to you, as well. Thanks.

Theresa: Especially now that hubby is coming home.

Christy: Something to do with masochistical tendencies, perhaps?

Joyce-Anne: THAT is insanely flattering.

Holly ATOM: Why do I have an urge for a cracker?

Momisodes: Thank you, Sandy. You write well, too.

Hyphen Mama: Tomorrow.

LceeL said...

Huckdoll: Welcome back. And please do catch up.

Eric S. said...

Dam, now I have to go check yesterdays post. I should have been by then, but was busy with the grandson.

You are right, people do, very easily fall into a "parroting" mode quite easily. I have even caught myself starting to, then I force myself to look at other sides of the situation.

The end of the Kid, say it isn't so. I know you have to end it but?

I don't think you will ever have to worry about creativity.

Kel said...

Oh . . . I don't know . . . I think mindless pap fits a fair amount of what I see on the boob tube when I walk through the family room. But there's good stuff there too from time to time.

I wish the painting muse would visit me more often . . . the magic only settles every so often. I really enjoy it when it does. Perhaps I'm just lazy.

maggie's mind said...

I like some of the mindless and mindful stuff on TV, each for different reasons, but taking a break is good sometimes. I also am still carrying your Sunday post around in my heart for reasons deeper than what I'll probably ever share publicly, and I'm glad it just came out. :)

I'll be back for The Kid!

abritdifferent said...

Your writing is just beautiful Lou, I can never tire of saying that.

nicole said...

I haven't turned the TV on once since hubby is in Germany.
But I sat at the computer the whole time :(
I can only try to imagine how hard yesterdays post was for you.
I had tears in my eyes reading it.