100 Word Challenge - evolution

First there's this ....
The following is in response to the 100 Word Challenge authored by the ascendant Velvet Verbosity. The word is 'evolution'.

Every electron, neutron and proton in your body has existed since the beginning of time. Since before there were molecules or atoms more complex than hydrogen and helium.

Every atom that makes you was made deep inside the body of some ancient and exploded star. Every single one. And also the atoms of your house, your car, the very ground you walk upon every day.

We were gas, and then star stuff, and then the rocky stuff of earth.
And then, slime and fish and reptiles and, eventually, ourselves.
We are the Universe, come to recognize itself.

We are evolution.

Then there's this ....
Hyphen Mama's painting is just about done. I want to check it over, tomorrow, and make sure I'm happy with it, frame it and get it ready to send. If you all don't mind, I want to hold off publishing photos of it until she has it in hand. I want her to be the first to see it. I KNOW you understand, right? I just want her to see it first.

It will ship on Tuesday - she should have it Thursday or Friday. Then.

And then there's this ....
I am a bit tossed, here. In my mind, there is the germ of an idea for a steamy sex scene between the Stewardess and The Kid on the flight from Albuquerque to Vegas. I don't know if I want to write this. It would be, because of the nature of their encounter and the time and place, quick and dirty. And rather explicit. Not necessarily GRAPHIC, but it makes a difference to the story later on, so it probably should be written. There's two ways to do it - and that's what I'm tossed about. One is to refer back to the encounter in the memory of one or the other (probably her) and the other way is to tell it as it happens - remembering, of course, that this whole story is flashback. If I tell it in memory, I can 'soften' it a bit. If I tell it direct, I have no idea what might happen. I'm not going to put up a poll, but I'll take opinions rendered in comment under advisement.

And, lastly, there's ....


Myst_72 said...

Go for it Lou, you can be explicit and not graphic - cos you're clever like that.


Jientje said...

There's a lot to think about here, as usual!
So I'll comment on the painting, and think about the rest a while longer.
It is so sweet and considerate, that you want her to see the painting first!! Of course, you made it for her!
That way we have "the Kid" on Thursday, and the painting on Friday, that's two things to look forward to.
On "The Kid". So the stewardess lives to tell the story huh?
Well yes of course, considering she works in the money room .. he needs her. Right.
I don't think I want to give you advice here, you're the writer, and a damn good one!
You were made out of an extraordinary brilliant ancient star, no doubt about that ...

Shadow said...

would it be greedy to have both?!?!?! yip, probably is. so you tell it the way it fits best into your story. can't wait for thursday....

Christy said...

Not JUST because I want it spicier.....I think a flashback inside a flashback might be hard to pull off.

Not that you can't.

Just harder.

(uh-oh....is that a challenge??? LOL)

Patsy said...

On your 100 Words -- good, not what I was expecting (me not you,always the teacher/critic) to be honest a little disappointing because I've come to expect you NOT to be predictable.

Of course you'll wait for Hyphen Mama to have the painting before sharing it with the rest of us. :) She deserves that.

My preference would be the softened encounter, from her. The fear and vulnerability she has shown us already makes it more plasible for her to dwell on the memorey of their union than for the Kid to think much of it. Unless of course, you know something I don't, which I'm sure you do, Omnipotent One. (I've never been one for being in the *bedroom* with a couple, but I enjoy hearing about it over a cup of coffee later.) :0

Rebecca said...

I'm looking forward to seeing the painting. I can't imagine how Hyphen Mama must feel. :)

warriorwoman said...

Yeah, I vote for sex.

Dirty, raunchy..........

Hyphen Mama said...

You fill my heart with happiness! I've already got a 'spot' picked out that's just in my front door for the whole world (um, MY whole world) to see.

And also...evolution. Very deep. Very full in so few words. Maybe you would consider writing school text books? Because I could have grasped that when I was 17, not that schools would consider teaching evolution.

And the sex? Well, I'll take whatever you put out. Ahem. I mean, we'll enjoy whatever it is that fits into the story best.

www.ayewonder.com said...

I say you write it. If people don't want to read it, they won't. But I would check your TOS.

moneythoughts said...

Lou, far out. Very nice piece on evolution. Aren't you worried about offending those among us that believe God created everything in six days? Personally, I think the world is big enough to have a multitude of beliefs, ideas and opinions. Near Cincinnati, in Kentucky there is a park that is devoted to the idea of creationism. It is known as the Creationism Museum. I am firmly in the camp with the evolutionists, but it does get a bit rocky when people want to teach creationism as science in the schools.

As for the sex scene in The Kid, you are the writer and whatever you write is fine with me. Too me the idea of reading a writer is to see things from another person's perspective. That goes for looking, listening or reading any work of art like paintings, music or even philosophy.

LceeL said...

myst_72: I don't want to get myself labeled as an 'Adult' blog, so I have to be careful. And - I have never really known the mind of a woman well enough to figure out, from HER point of view, what would make such an encounter possible.

jientje: Thank you, Jientje. You are such a sweetheart.

shadow: I'm glad you can't wait for Thursday - but don't forget we're talking about the episode the week after.

Christy: Harder? harder... I will behave, I will behave, I will behave.

Patsy: Once again, I will behave ... I need to be careful about 'Adult' blog and all that.

Rebecca: Thank you. That's sweet.

Warriorwoman: Okay, then. *blush* I can do that. But will you still respect me in the morning?

Hyphen Mama: I just hope it's worthy of display.

ayewonder: Yeah, You've got me worried now. If I have to, I'll move it over to an adult blog and give everybody the password.

moneythoughts: Well, creationists might have a difficulty with it, I guess, but I haven't heard any complaints ....

Anonymous said...

I have yet to take up any 100-word challenges. I'd like to though. Well done.

LceeL said...

abritdifferent: Thank you, Siobhan. If you were to 'take up' the Challenge, I'm sure you would be great. So sure.

Jientje said...

I had fun with my camera again today! A Brazilian party, Cuban dancers, Salsa, Meringue ....
It was a blast! boy oh boy, I must have taken at least five or six hundred pictures!!! They even offered me a job, what do you know!
I'm exhausted!!

Oh, I'm glad you liked the dragon!
Night night Lou, I'll see you in the morning!

warriorwoman said...

No, absolutely not.

Can we have the sex scene now?

Joyce-Anne said...

I know I'm visiting late--had company over to celebrate oldest and second oldest children's birthdays I'm glad the party's over because now I finally got to read today's post.

The 100 word post on evolution was great. It was a pleasure to read. I liked that it was different from what you've done.

Of course, Hyphen Mama has to see the painting first. But, personally, I am waiting patiently to see it.

As far as The Kid...you're the author and I know you will write whatever you sense is "right" for the chapter.

Sandy C. said...

Very clever choice for evolution :) I suck, and may not be able to participate AGAIN this week! Just so swamped with family.

I have to admit that I am anxiously awaiting to see the painting, too.

Sex? I can't thing of anyone better to write a steamy scene.

LceeL said...

Jientje: Good noght, my Belgian Princess.

warriorwoman: Good. I wasn't looking for repect in the morning anyway. Sex scene, coming up. Week after this coming one.

Joyce-Anne: Thank you, so much, for coming by - even after such a busy day. That, THAT is flattering.

Sandy: You have family stuff to do. THAT is what is important. You do NOT suck.

maggie's mind said...

Whatever you do with The Kid, I can't wait to read, and I do hope you will share pictures of the painting once it's been received at the other end.

Nicole said...

I think you know my opinion :D
But I go with the flow and take it as it comes (uh....)


Peace :)!

Velvet Verbosity said...

I feel like my comments will get lost in the fray.

First, I had to read this piece a couple of times to appreciate it. I think someone here said they expected you to do something different, and I guess I somehow did also. However, once I got over that, and read this piece again, I decided I like it. It has clean language and good rhythm.

As for the sex scene. Writing itself is an evolution. As you write, the characters begin to dictate what happens next, and you must stay true to that, whatever it is.

MRMacrum said...

Just as every electron has existed forever, so has your 100 words. They had just not fused together yet into the form you put down.

Sometimes pointing out there is nothing new under the Sun in a different way makes us appreciate more of how special we, as aware beings, really are.

I liked it.

LceeL said...

maggies mind: Pictures have, in fact. been shared.

Nicole: You are about as easy going as they come.

Velvet Verbosity: I read EVERY comment - they come to me in email. Some more anticipated than others.

MRMacrum: Thank you. And yes, we are ALL special.